He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends. --Proverbs 17:9
Being in a marriage is the most intimate relationship we can have this side of Heaven. It is an important one that we need. Within that relationship lies an inner circle of trust and love. Those two elements must be there to cover and help deal with the secrets and dark places of our lives that need light. Without the security of intimacy, people will seek to find it elsewhere - often with another or a distraction like work or a hobby.
Building intimacy in your marriage takes a long time and is very delicate. Who wants to expose EVERYTHING about themselves? But that is what a true marriage is built on. Your partner knowing every little detail about you.
I think Seth and I are pretty fortunate in this department because we have been around each other for almost 12 years, there aren't many secrets we don't know about each other. And it also means that there is A LOT we know about how each other works.
I still struggle with revealing my true feelings at times because I don't want Seth to think less of me, but I realize that he can help me get over them and deal with them if I let him in. For example, being pregnant has brought on a lot of thoughts, changes, and questions. Since he has a lot of knowledge in the area of pregnancy, it can be both a blessing and curse at times. I realize that I need to share all those pieces with him because he will want to help me.
So what does this come down to? Prayer. Listening with a gentle heart. Ultimately loving above all else.
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